We fear what our neighbours will think. We fear about our standards. We fear about our clothes, hairstyles, looks etc. We fear about our jobs. We fear about careers. We fear about our results. Even, we have fear for our lives. We fear about our favourite things. We fear that our comfort zone would be away from us one day.

It's not happening to us. Death was a distant entity. The COVID crisis in no time has collectively given us the sudden realization that it is happening to us!! All our reassuring narratives and stories that soothed us have been questioned. The helplessness and powerlessness is making our minds chaotic. Our reality has been crushed. Truth came very abruptly. The truth of our mortality, our vulnerability, our weak existence in the face of this adversity.

When I was a child, all I aspired to do was hang a college degree on my wall, get a sustainable job, and make my parents proud. Well, not only me, probably almost all of us, the 90’s kids, shared a similar outlook towards our future. And while some of us still do, for me, things changed!

I'm sorry
If I woke you up last night
My pen told me secrets in whispers
And I carved scars and tales

So much is going on in this world that I feel so sad like when I see innocent people suffering due to terrorism, genocide, racism etc. This is the case where people who have done no wrong are suffering. The major question is why? And nobody is going to answer this why and this is the thing that I am afraid of.

I thought other girls had boys flocking
Everywhere they turned, there was a boy lurking
Of this I could almost swear I was sure
But then I grew and learned it was not so
The other girl down the street was battling drugs…

Everyone in this world is trying their best to contribute a teensy bit in this huge world with an ocean of knowledge. Some of us achieve the brownie points, while the others remain deprived until the right time. However, we all get paid for whatever contribution we make for the betterment of this world. Why are people trying to humiliate and belittle the efforts that others are making every day?

I'll even tell them I agree with them because I no longer feel the need to defend myself in the face of people who aren't even willing to listen to what I have to say. If they can't trust me and accept me and acknowledge me for who and what I am and for what I give to them selflessly, I'm not going to force them to. I'll step away, back off, and they won't even realize I've done so.

As we all know, this era is fast and modern, and we should be smart like our cell phones and perform well on every manifesto of work, as mother, as a daughter, as a co-worker, as a wife, and as a reliable woman of society, but in all these processes, we’ve lost ourselves. We need to pause everything (like everything) to get that young, free spirited, beautiful, strong girl back in form.

Pain and sorrows are never a joke, no matter how silly the reason behind it.
If you're hurt, you're hurt. You don't need to give any clarification, about why it's affecting you.
Emotions don't require any explanation.

This world deserves so much better than what actually is happening right now. Our people need love, kindness, and a reminder that whoever they are, wherever they live, whatever they believe in, they should learn to own their identity, their body, their origin, and learn to love themselves. 

"We have empowered the girls" said the society. But not as empowered as to talk boldly about their periods, sighed the whispers in the black plastic. Why do we treat sanitary pads as a radioactive isotope? Why are they wrapped with newspaper and black plastics?

In this world full of selfish minded people, don't dare to leave a person who loves you unconditionally. Those rare gems will make your life easy and will give you strength whenever you will encounter tough times. Keep your own tribe close to you even if a little bit drifting starts taking place!

On most days, 
I am the silent spectator 
standing just behind the barricade,
always the front seat passenger in a moving car,
never the actual protagonist, 
but always a presence in the story 
the editor chose not to cut out.

Why is that that in spite of sharing the same sky, the same sun rays, and the same air, we remain indifferent of one another? What makes it more unbelievable is that we hate some people just for a simple reason which is not even their fault! Why do we think that we are superior to others just because we are from a major religion and the other is not; or because we are straight and they are from LGBTQ+ community; or just for the silliest reason - for you being a man and the other a woman!

We live in a time where female friendships are expected to be toxic, bitchy and/or competitive. That is the power the media has in shaping perceptions, something I think they take very lightly, or not? I do not mean that some women are not bitchy or toxic or competitive sometimes BUT these characteristics are not the defining factor of what female friendships should be like.

Maybe you’re supposed to be studying right now but you’re reading this, maybe a lot of your work is unresolved but you’re watching re-runs of your favorite show, maybe you have errands to complete but you just can’t find the will to get work done. We spend so much time believing we’re feeling nothing, doing nothing when we’re doing so many little things together. We’ve trained our minds into believing that we have to be productive at every single waking moment.

And you’ll learn,
that you’re strong,
when you lose.
You’ll need no gardeners
for you’ll learn
to decorate 
the garden of your soul

Here I am on a plane miles away from home, relocating! What exactly had I thought taking a job that I am not even sure I can keep? Who was I trying to prove something to? Was it myself? Or family? Or Saleem? It'd sure be pleasant to show that good for nothing fool who I turned out to be. I mean I'm no longer the, "I'm sorry" type, whether I had made the mistake or not. I'm more of the "why doth my God try me with imbeciles" type!